最新搞笑说说 你不笑不可能

1．不写作业心里难受，一写作业浑身难受。

1. It's hard not to do homework. It's hard to do homework.

2．英语听力就是听俩傻逼说话，完了还反过来问我们，他们说了什么。

最新搞笑说说

2. English listening is to listen to two stupid people talking, and then ask us what they said.

3．梦里梦到的人，醒来就该去睡了他。

3. The dreamer should go to sleep when he wakes up.

4．别人一夸我帅，我就担心，担心别人夸得不够。

4. As soon as others praise me for being handsome, I worry about that others don't praise me enough.

5．昨天闺蜜丢了个5s，空间发了个动态。今天十多个朋友打电话慰问她！她说：妈的，不是要充电器就是要手机套的！我安慰闺蜜说：真是一群人渣，不用理他们，你那个耳机应该还在吧，你看没用就

5. Yesterday, my best friend lost a 5S, and the space made a movement. Today, more than ten friends called to comfort her! She said: shit, either charger or mobile phone cover! I comforted my girlfriend and said: it's really a group of scum. Don't care about them. Your earphone should still be there. It's useless

6．让你感觉最孤独的一句话是什么就差你没交作业了

6. What makes you feel the most lonely is that you have not handed in your homework

7．孤独的人要吃饱饭，所以我特么才这么胖。

7. Lonely people have to eat, so I am so fat.

8．其实唐僧也挺色的，碰到长的不怎么样的叫施主，碰到长得好看的就叫女菩萨。

8. In fact, Tang monk is also very lustful. When he meets a person who is not very long, he is called a benefactor. When he meets a person who looks good, he is called a Bodhisattva.

9．我拿出尘封已久的作业，抖了抖上面的灰，又放了回去。

9. I took out my dusty homework, shook the dust on it, and put it back.

10．看韩剧男主角！看日剧女主角！那国产剧是什么呢？广告之后马上回来

10. Watch the leading actor of Korean drama! Watch the heroine of Japanese Opera! What's the Chinese opera? I'll be right back after the ad

11．现在不好好学习，以后别人壁咚的墙就是你曾经搬过的砖。

11. If you don't study hard now, the wall of others will be the brick you once moved.

12．谁能一口气读完，红鲤鱼与绿鲤鱼与驴。

12. Who can read it in one breath? Red carp and green carp and donkey.

13．我知道我伸出手你不会跟我走，于是我伸出了腿，把你绊倒，你果然站起来追着我跑。

13. I know that you will not follow me when I stretch out my hand, so I stretch out my legs and trip you. You really stand up and run after me.

14．小学同学都从小屁孩变成男神女神了，而我从小屁孩变成了大屁孩。

14. All my classmates in primary school have become gods and goddesses since childhood, while I have become big farts since childhood.

15．丈夫在电话里告诉妻子：刚才派出所的民警来说，我们家的门被小偷撬了。妻子急问：钱和存折丢了吗？丈夫说：我想不会的。妻子说：为什么？丈夫说：我找了十年都找不到，小偷这么一会儿工夫就能找到吗？

15. The husband told his wife by phone that the police at the police station just now said that the door of our house had been pried by a thief. The wife asks urgently: money and bankbook lost? The husband said: I don't think so. The wife said: why? The husband said: I can't find it after ten years. Can the thief find it in such a short time?

16．我发现你和莎士比亚有一半像。哪里像？莎比

16. I find you half like Shakespeare. Where is it like? Sabitu 

17．女生之间何必那么斤斤计较，反正几十年后大家都要一起跳广场舞的。

17. Why are girls so fussy about each other? In any case, we all need to dance together in square dance in decades.

18．虽然说早起早睡身体好，可是晚起晚睡我心情好啊。

18. Although it's good to get up early and go to bed early, I'm in a good mood to get up late and go to bed late.

19．当好朋友有了对象以后，我就觉得我辛辛苦苦养的猪让人吃了的感觉。

19. When a good friend has an object, I feel that the pig I worked hard to raise makes people eat.

20．我希望开学有个帅帅的同桌，很多女生给他递情书，送大堆零食，最后他一脸嫌弃的丢给我。

20. I hope to have a handsome deskmate at the beginning of the school. Many girls give him love letters and a lot of snacks. At last, he throws them to me.