雷人的空间说说 冷笑话句子集

1．明明长得很漂亮，我却要努力读书，这就是我和明明的差距。

1. Mingming is very beautiful, but I have to study hard. This is the gap between Mingming and me.

2．你我之间并无缘分，全靠我颜值死撑。

冷笑话句子集

2. There is no predestination between you and me. It depends on my appearance.

3．等你以后结婚了，结婚对象不是我，我就搬到你家隔壁住，做一个安静的老王。

3. When you get married later, I will move to your next door to be a quiet old king.

4．当年我背井离乡，乡里的人再没能喝上一口井水。

4. When I was away from my hometown, people in the countryside couldn't drink any more well water.

5．在便利店打工，老板叮嘱我收银时千万注意别收到假钱，不然每发现一张假币就扣我50元工资。我把老板的话记在心上，当晚就把柜台里百元钞全换成了假币。

5. When working in a convenience store, my boss told me not to receive any fake money when I was checking in, or I would be fined 50 yuan for every counterfeit money I found. I took my boss's words to heart and changed all the hundred yuan bills in the counter into counterfeit ones that night.

6．我好怕被台风吹到别人怀里去，毕竟像我这样的，别人是肯定不会还的。

6. I'm so afraid of being carried to others' arms by typhoon. After all, people like me will definitely not return it.

7．严重怀疑月老把我的红绳拿去织毛衣了。

7. It's seriously suspected that Yuelao took my red rope to knit a sweater.

8．公交车上我频频看你，你频频看我，我对你一见钟情，而你却紧紧捂着钱包。

8. I look at you frequently on the bus. You look at me frequently. I fall in love with you at first sight, but you hold your wallet tightly.

9．马上就要当学长了，可惜学的不行，长的也不行。

9. I'm going to be a long-term student soon. Unfortunately, I can't learn, nor can I grow.

10．那次坐公交车试着学韩国女主角头靠窗含情脉脉的看窗外，结果路太烂把我颠成了脑震荡。

10. That time I tried to learn from the Korean heroine by taking the bus. She looked out of the window with affection. As a result, the road was too bad and I was shocked.

11．其实每次嘴上跟你发完脾气我就特别后悔，后悔没有动手打你。

11. In fact, I regret every time I lose my temper with you. I regret not hitting you.

12．假期过半，我已随朋友们的动态走遍了大江南北。

12. After half of the holiday, I have traveled all over the country with my friends.

13．买完菜被叫住姑娘，还没给钱呢，付完钱又被叫住姑娘，还没找钱呢，找完钱再被叫住姑娘，菜没拿。。。

13. After buying the vegetables, the girl is called. I haven't given the money yet. After paying the money, the girl is called. I haven't changed the money yet. After finding the money, the girl is called again. I haven't taken the vegetables...

14．暖一个女生的叫暖男，暖好多女生的那叫热狗。

14. The warm girl is called warm man, and the warm girl is called hot dog.

15．一开宝马的和一个开奔驰的说，这油价还是太便宜了，要是涨到70多一升就好了，这样那些开破车的就加不起油了！我们就不用排队了。Www.Shuoshuokong.Com这时听见一开劳斯莱斯的说，哥们你说的对，什么时候要是涨到700一升就好了！这样那些开破奔驰宝马的就加不起了。我更不用排队了！我终于忍不住了，要是涨到7000一升那才好了！这样我骑电动车的在路上就顺畅多了，牛逼啥呀。

15. A driver of BMW and a driver of Mercedes Benz said that the oil price is too cheap. If it goes up to more than 70 liters, it will be good, so those who drive broken cars will not be able to afford gas! We don't have to line up. Www.Shuoshuokong.Com At this time, I heard a Rolls Royce saying, "man, you are right. When would you like to go up to 700 liters?"! In this way, those who break through Mercedes Benz and BMW can't be added. I don't have to wait in line! I can't help it at last. If it goes up to 7000 liters, it will be good! In this way, I can ride the electric vehicle on the road more smoothly. What's the driving force.

16．生活中有许多出人意料的事情，比如，你以为我要举个例子。

16. There are many unexpected things in life, for example, you think I want to give an example.

17．你失眠的时候都在想什么呢？想睡觉。

17. What do you think when you are sleepless? Want to sleep.

18．我会找个和你同姓的男朋友，生个儿子，就叫你的名字，做不成夫妻，你就做我儿子吧！

18. I'll find a boyfriend with the same surname as you, give birth to a son, and call your name. If you can't be a husband and wife, you can be my son!

19．如果再见不能红着脸，是否可以借点钱。

19. If you can't blush again, can you borrow some money.

20．老妈指责我道：你太懒了，脏衣服放了好几天还不洗！我辩称：作业多，没时间洗。拉倒吧，我还不知道你？老妈言之凿凿地说，想当年我怀你的时候，别人家孩子都踢妈妈，就你从来不踢，你打娘胎里就懒。

20. My mother accused me: you are too lazy. You haven't washed your dirty clothes for several days! I argued: too much homework, no time to wash. Pull it down, I don't know you? My mother said firmly that when I was pregnant with you, other people's children kicked their mothers, so you never kicked, and you were lazy when you hit your mother.