2020最新搞笑说说 空间个性签名

1．有一种凄凉叫这道数学题已经超过了我的语文理解范围。

1. There is a bleak saying that this math problem has exceeded my understanding of Chinese.

2020最新搞笑说说

2．学校交钱频率快到家长都认为我吸毒了。

2. The school pays money so frequently that parents think I'm taking drugs.

3．天下没有不散的宴席，但如果要是你请客，我可以陪你多吃一会。

3. There is no banquet that doesn't go away, but if you treat me, I can accompany you for a while.

4．现在起床不是看毅力，而是看尿意。

4. Getting up now is not about perseverance, but about urination.

5．在你人生的某个年龄段，它总是每个月来一次，它来得一般很准时，当然提前几天、推迟几天也是常有的事。它来时，常伴有生理反应，比如紧张、烦躁、失眠、心情郁闷、甚至食欲不振，当然最神奇的是，住一个宿舍的几个人，它来的日子竟然会一致，没错，它就是该死的月考

5. At a certain age in your life, it always comes once a month. It usually comes on time. Of course, it's also common to put it off a few days in advance. When it comes, it is often accompanied by physiological reactions, such as nervousness, irritability, insomnia, depression, and even loss of appetite. Of course, the most amazing thing is that several people who live in a dormitory will come on the same day. Yes, it is the damn monthly test

6．周末我要和男票去看电影，帮忙推荐几个男票。

6. I want to go to the movies with men's tickets at weekends and help recommend some men's tickets.

7．觉得自己特别迷人的时候一定要拍下来，让照片给你清醒清醒。

7. When you feel particularly attractive, you must take a picture to make it clear to you.

8．有一件事我不想瞒大家了，我想瞒两件。

8. I don't want to hide one thing from you. I want to hide two things.

9．小学获得的优秀少先队员很有可能是我一生政治生涯的顶峰。

9. The excellent young pioneers in primary school are likely to be the peak of my political career.

10．我一直相信，有一天我闺蜜会变得很有钱，然后包养我，结果，那几个傻逼也是这样想的。

10. I have always believed that one day my best friend will become very rich, and then support me. As a result, those fools think the same.

11．当好朋友有了对象后，我就觉得自己养了多年的猪被别人吃了。

11. When a good friend has an object, I feel that the pig I raised for many years has been eaten by others.

12．有人说我长得帅，我笑了，因为我笑起来更帅。

12. Some people say that I am handsome. I smile because I smile more handsome.

13．世界上最远的距离是老师在讲第四章，学霸在看第八章，而我却在看目录。

13. The furthest distance in the world is that the teacher is talking about the fourth chapter, the learning bully is looking at the eighth chapter, but I am looking at the catalogue.

14．剩下的路你一定要好好走，而我，你得背我。

14. You must walk the rest of the way well, and I, you have to carry me.

15．晚上回家爬楼梯，自己爬的正开心呢，后面来了一大叔。估计大叔挺着急，说了句：美女让我先过去呗？我当时神经一抽，回头跟大叔说：咦，你能看见我啊？我忘不了当时大叔那纠结复杂惊讶的眼神。大叔，你别转身就跑啊！大叔，你听我说，大叔！对不起，我错了！

15. At night, when I went home to climb the stairs, I was very happy. There was a uncle in the back. It's estimated that uncle was very worried and said, "beauty let me go first?"? When I was nervous, I turned to my uncle and said, "Gee, can you see me?"? I can't forget my uncle's complicated and surprised eyes at that time. Uncle, don't turn around and run! Uncle, listen to me, uncle! Sorry, I'm wrong!

16．从前车马很慢，书信很远，一生只够爱一人，却可以逛青楼，三妻四妾。

16. Once upon a time, horses and cars were very slow, letters were far away, only enough to love one person in one's life, but you could go to brothels, three wives and four concubines.

17．以后早点睡，别仗着自己丑就肆无忌惮的熬夜。

17. Go to bed early in the future. Don't stay up recklessly because of your ugliness.

18．今天外面风这么大，我好害怕，万一别人都刮走了，就我刮不走，那多丢人。

18. It's so windy outside today that I'm afraid. If everyone else blows away, I won't be able to do it. That's a shame.

19．有一种人，他不喜欢你还不让你喜欢别人，这种人就是班主任。

19. There is a kind of person who doesn't like you and doesn't let you like others. This kind of person is the head teacher.

20．现在不想跟人聊天一般都是吃饭了等会儿我先洗澡，哪像小学那么酷，直接不是本人。

20. Now I don't want to chat with people. I usually have dinner. I'll take a bath first. It's not as cool as primary school. It's not me.